Walking my own path is difficult enough without trying to figure out what’s best for others. What I do know is that some of the hatred displayed on the internet especially in anonymous forums is disconcerting.

Rather than boycotting the web, I’ve decided to start my own fight the crap movement with a series of interviews with people from all walks of life.

I’m starting with Nadya Suleman, the controversial mother of fourteen whose story captured the internet, before Tiger Woods hijacked it all.

q. After giving birth to the octuplets there was so a lot of negative press. Some went as far as suggesting that you actually had the babies to gain media attention. What’s your response to this?

It’s ridiculous to suggest that I’d have eight children to get on television. Mine was a difficult and unexpected situation. I didn’t have the babies to get in the media spotlight, I had my children because I love them and I always wanted a large family. I adore kids, I have fourteen of them and love them beyond anything I could express in words. The media frenzy was a consequence, not something I had in mind when I wanted to expand my family.

q. Some of the controversy focused on your choice to have multiple children at once, and on the fact that you were a single mother already caring for six little ones.
a. I understood the criticism and where people were coming from, especially with some of the negative press and headlines. People don’t know me and go by a few titles they read on the news, so it’s easy to form incorrect opinions.
In terms of my decision, I wanted one more child, which wouldn’t have made a difference to me because I already had six. I didn’t start out wanting eight babies at once. I had six embryos available to me and I considered those my babies. I would have never destroyed them, but keeping embryos is difficult financially and emotionally. We went ahead and implanted the six embryos because of my history of the embryos not taking, so I never expected all of them to take. I had the option to abort them but I would have never done that. That’s how I found myself pregnant with multiples. It wasn’t planned, but it happened.

q. Did your background have a lot to do with your desire to have a large family?
a. It did in the sense that I was an only child and really wanted siblings growing up. I felt very lonely.

q. How was and is your relationship with your parents right now?
a. Growing up we didn’t have a lot of money. My father had some issues with addiction. I didn’t have the best relationship with my parents, but they tried. Right now, I’m working on my relationship with my mother. I believe it’s important to have grandma around for the children, have contact, have her involved. It’s not easy but I try hard.

q. Do you have particular religious or ethnic traditions you identify with?
a. I currently attend protestant church.

q. I’m not going to ask you which one, or photographers will flock to it. But what is it like to be a mom always in the spotlight, to have your every move followed, everything you do judged?
a. It can be tough. I know who I am behind the ‘octomom’ label. I can separate myself from this image. I’m not even angry or mad at people who have personally attacked me because I know who I am, what I’m about, how much I care for my children. I try to stay focused on the positive and avoid negativity. There were many things that were out there in the media that were completely incorrect which contributed to some of the anger people showed toward me. Everyone believed that I was taking government aid, that’s not true. I’m self supporting, I pay my bills and I work hard.

q. Pregnancy isn’t easy, and your body has been through a lot. Was recovering difficult for you and what helped?
a. Recovery was very smooth. I had a c-section and healed up quickly. I lost all of the weight and I attribute that to really good genes. I did have some issues afterward which were covered extensively in the news, but overall things went very well for me and for the babies.

q. Do you get time for yourself, for example to exercise?
a. I have very little time to myself, I focus on giving each child individual attention whenever I can. I’m almost always with one or two of the kids and really try to give the older ones time alone with mommy. I get to go to the gym in the middle of the night, I don’t sleep that much but I try to take naps whenever I can.

q. You’re a single mom with many little ones. Do you envision the babies’ father involved in their upbringing, or do you see yourself doing it alone?
a. I would love the father to take part, but I don’t believe he will. Initially, after the eight were born I tried, but it’s not happening, and it won’t happen in the near future

q. In what way do you think the media has been unfair to you or to your children?
Luckily, they haven’t been unfair to the kids. For me personally, I think that they painted me as someone who intentionally did this – had the octuplets – to gain media attention rather than someone who made a choice and then found herself at the center of media frenzy. It’s a difficult position because no matter what I do the media tries to spin it negatively. I support a large family completely on my own. I would be lambasted if I were on government dollars, and lambasted if I do a documentary about my life.

q. What would you like the public to know about you?
a. I’m a single mom who fully supports her family. I make choices, I learn, I make some mistakes, I make good decisions, and I move forward, like any other mom. I want to use whatever good or voice I have right now for something positive, for causes I believe in. I want to help with autism research and support. This is very close to my heart because one of my children has autism and I know how tough it can be on a parent. I’m involved with a program sponsored by UC Riverside called SEARCH which provide support and resources for families dealing with autism. I would like to do more in this field.

q. Do you have support and a sympathetic ear when you need something?
a. I have friends. In the last few months I’ve unfortunately discovered that many people want to get something out of the situation, so I have to be careful. A friend sold pictures of me pregnant and that was tough. But yes, I do have friends.

q. What are your future plans?
a. I don’t think past tomorrow! Right now I’m writing a memoir and have a great support system, great nannies and my attorney Jeffrey Czech. All these people have really helped me. And I don’t look at the internet or read the newspapers, I concentrate on my family and my work.

q. Everyone seems to be so focused on the difficult aspects of having many children at once. What are some of the positive aspects?
a. It’s great that my children grow up together and have each other in a way that I didn’t. It’s wonderful to see how they are attached to one another, to know that they will always have this strong bond. They learn to share more, learn to be helpful and there’s always so much going on, it’s so alive.
For me seeing all my babies develop together, laugh with each other, help each other out, it fills me with happiness. Life with many children can be challenging but the rewards are worth every minute of it.

I’ve known her for a couple of years through her work for military spouses, and I first spoke with her when she started out with Army Wife Talk Radio which is now part of Army Wife Network, a great resource for Army Wives.

Tara is a real genuine person. I remember when I asked for help with my own radio show I expected her to blow me off. But she didn’t. She encouraged me, pointed me to resources and shared her knowledge. I’ve rarely encountered someone who’s more upfront and supportive than Tara.

Here is Tara’s Q&A, talk about inspiration!

Q: Your story is inspiring to all military wives. I remember a couple of years ago when you started out with Army wife talk radio and had a few listeners – could you imagine being followed by thousands and becoming as successful as you have been?

Tara: Absolutely did not see this coming! I started Army Wife Talk Radio, as you know, as a hobby. I never imagined I would make this “job” a career. I love what I do though and am very passionate about it. Perhaps that is why it just “happened.”

Q: What were some of the toughest obstacles at the beginning of your journey?

Tara: I still think one of the toughest obstacles is having people take us seriously. I think that until they really dive into the AWNetwork they just see a group of women chatting. We are an amazing group and there is a lot of value to an advertiser/sponsor in our group. We are also reaching more people than we’re given credit for a lot of times. If you want to find a young military wife – she’s on the internet. Chances are she’s not going to the local post meetings unless she’s already a seasoned volunteer. Our job is to reach out to her and give her the resources and confidence to take that step and involve herself in this journey. Take for instance a Field Exercise (our conferences) and the posts we visit – I think they always get more than they expected because never thought we’d be giving them what we do.

Q: What advice do you have for military spouses who want to go for their dreams but are faced with military life obstacles, moving around, husband gone so often?

Tara: Dream big. Possibilities are endless. That sounds hokey and cliché but it’s true. I never thought I couldn’t do this. That’s why I did it. I have a little picture frame on the side of my desk – it says “never, never, never, give up!!” I don’t. I have had plenty of people tell me no. That’s their loss. If they’re smart they’ll hook onto my train because we have no where to go but up. I have to believe that. I know we can make this a huge success!

Q: You always seem to have a positive attitude – the secret?

Tara Crooks: Never, never, never, give up!! No seriously, you only see the good parts. I have my “moments”. But really in the end even when you do have issues come up (and they will come up) you have to see the reason behind it or the purpose for why it happened etc. My mama was instrumental in teaching me to find that in my life. She is an amazing teacher.

Q: Do you get tired or frustrated of being a military spouse and what cheers you up when that happens?

Tara: Um. Is this a trick question? Can I plead the 5th? OF COURSE I get tired and frustrated of being a military spouse – who doesn’t? And if someone does say they don’t ever get frustrated …they’re lying! Ironically what cheers me up the most (besides a glass of wine, good magazine, bubble bath, oreo cookies, a good cry, and/or a movie marathon) is my military spouse sisters. I know they’ve been there and done that and that they truly understand. Plus, the few great ones I have in my life really ‘ground’ me and Lord knows I need that!

Q: When you gave birth to your youngest daughter your husband was deployed. It takes a strong woman to do what you did and to stay positive. How did you manage?

Tara: Lots of positive affirmations. That was the single most hardest time of my life. I did not, I repeat, did not think I was going to make it. I remember telling Star (business partner) that I couldn’t do this (Army Wife Network) anymore because how was I supposed to mentor others if I couldn’t hold my own life and feelings together? She told me “You will. You have to.” I still remember that day. I knew right then she was right. What I was going through was what any other Army wife out there would and could do. I could do it. I didn’t have a choice. So I put on my big girl panties and soldiered up. Now look, I did it. She was right.

Q: Tell me a little bit about Army Wife Network and how it became such a valuable resource for Army Wives everywhere

Tara: AWN was born as a necessity. Our talk radio program, live conferences, and column were all wonderful “accidents” that had no business plan behind them. Army Wife Network combined them all under one roof. It gave us a home. An amazing place to network and become a family along this journey. We encompass not only what we had in the AWTR show, Field Problems article, and Field Exercise conferences, but expert columns, resource database, entertainment, shopping, social networking and more!

Q: What’s in store for you and Army wife network in the future?

Tara: Just keep growing…just keep growing…We hope to be doing what we do five years from now and just keep growing and empowering along the way.

Q: Where can we find your column?

Tara: On the website www.armywifenetwork.com and hopefully very soon in a post newspaper near you!