A few days ago a friend of mine invited me to her church — a large, spectacular and impressive conglomerate of buildings and fun. From the moment the usher opened the door, the churchgoers welcomed us with friendly smiles and open arms. The place was impressive, with a coffee shop, (Starbucks coffee people!), a bookstore, a large playground, amazing children’s programs and great music.
Everyone was dressed casually and we felt comfortable. My kids were excited to go to their classes and the music in the sanctuary was very good. I enjoyed clapping my hands along to the tunes, I can’t sing so I didn’t even try. Everything seemed to be ok until the message started.
The pastor started by telling the congregation what an awful place the world has become. He then stressed that Americans are the greatest people in the world, and we’re unjustly persecuted. Then, he alerted us to the many lost souls around us — Catholics, Muslims, Homosexuals and those who don’t know Jesus. He also asked us to pray about the president, who is so very lost. And some of the lost, he continued, were in the church at that very moment — I waited for him to stare right at me when he said this.
I began to wonder if the preacher and I were living in parallel worlds because my world doesn’t look like his. At all.
I heard a few more warnings and loud amens and the message was finally over. I definitely needed some fresh air. I went to pick up my children, and have to say, that they really enjoyed their time in the church classes.
I know that my friend invited me to be nice and to share something she believes in, maybe because she was hoping she could help me to be ’saved’ but I appreciated were her feelings were coming from.
I respect that and appreciate her efforts.
But while I don’t wish to disrespect anyone’s views, I found the preacher’s rhetoric and his worldview disappointing. For a place so filled with love and camaraderie, I was saddened that he asked his congregation to focus on God by telling them who was outside the fold. I’m not saying he doesn’t have the right to say which ideas are right and wrong – that’s part of his interpretation of what his faith is.
But I’m uncomfortable with anyone who can preach with such confidence that “we’re morally superior, they’re morally astray.”
I’ve met very religious people before who didn’t make me feel this way.
And it’s not only extremely conservative groups who alienate “outsiders.” Uber liberals do the same thing, without ever seeing the irony in accusing everyone else of being intolerant and, after all, lost.
I guess I can’t tolerate someone who preaches love when they can’t tolerate so many other human beings for their choices.
I’ll always be friends with the woman who invited me to church, but I won’t be going back, despite the nice buildings and the great coffee.
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English
well, I’ll put it this way. The frosting was nice, but the cake was sour. Sorry, but I would have been tempted to get up and leave.
LAW
I bet you would have gotten up and left! But I had the kids and my friend was a sweet person, so I stuck it out
Cheers,
Anita
Kudos to you for braving it out. I might have left when I saw the Starbucks coffee. I’ve been in those kinds of churches. We’ll call them “extreme right,” and they’re not for me. I’d rather go to hell. Come find me, I’ll be selling the snowballs
I cannot even begin to tell you how much I can relate to this post. Hands down, the most significant struggle I have with finding a religious niche is that my beliefs so often do not quite align with the ones that are actively encouraged within a particular community. For example, in this case? I would have stuck it through, just like you did, but I wouldn’t return. I just don’t think that the way to include is to exclude, you know?
I may be the only one but don’t get this. What does having a “Starbucks” at church make it “extreme right”? I go to a church that serves Starbucks coffee and they only preach the Word of God. Why would you go to church if you don’t want to hear the Bible preached? I find it funny that people chose to go to church and then get upset because of what is being preached. If you don’t like the Bible then don’t go to church. Nobody forces you to believe the Bible. You have a right to chose what to believe. I am sorry to crush the world but everyone does not get to heaven.
It really bothers me that people go to church on their own and then get upset on what is being taught. Do you really think a church is going to tell you that “truth is relative” and do what you want? Pick up the Bible and read it. If you find something that goes against what was taught than fine but otherwise don’t expect the church to bow down to the world. You have a choice to go or not go. Stop complaining that a church stands for the Bible. It’s only extreme if it’s a cult. Most churches preach the Bible and that is the real issue.
Society wants truth to be “relative” and no “absolute”. With this thinking we will one day have no laws because what is wrong to me is not wrong to others. Let’s just let everyone do what they want no matter who they hurt. All this just to say, “if you don’t like hearing the Bible preached don’t go into church”. That is what a church does.
Many years ago, I stood where you are, Anita, and like you, I did not like the “message.” No one likes to hear that their thinking and lifestyle are wrong..We as adults make choices daily, and this is a God-given privilege. The problem is that God has written some absolute truths about what is acceptable in His sights, and what is not, and many are not willing to accep these truths, and never learn to make the choices that please God. Some preachers are more zealous than others in regards to pointing the flaws in society, while others just limit themselves to preach a sermon that does not challenge the soul nor nurtures it. I believe that what you experienced was a spiritual encounter with Truth, in perhaps, not the most gentle way. Perhaps you identify more with the “lost world,” and you chose to be offended rather than to be challenged with “what is my truth, and how does God see me.” I don’t believe it matters to anyone in the church who you are, or what you stand for when you come in..They welcome you as a thirsty soul for God, even if you are not…but just an observer…. Perhaps you did not come to find Truth, so when Truth found you, you felt guilty or uncomfortable. Rather than accepting it, you chose to reject the message and the church.. God’s Truth is by His design to help you see God’s grace ..that in spite of where you are spiritually, God loves you, and He takes you just the way you come, but He hopes you will find Christ and be changed. I hope that your husband is doing well, and you and your children are comforted knowing God is caring for him. I will be praying for you all.
Your bravery knows no bounds! Not only are you caring for your family while your husband is away at war, you open up a “dialogue” of sorts on your blog about God. I applaud your efforts both in visiting a different church and then sharing it with the world.
After reading it and the comments, my mind is racing with things to say without knowing where to start.
I’ll just say this – it is my belief that we are a many varied and diverse group of individual human beings on this large, large planet and God (or whatever language you use) loves all humanity – each and every one of us. No “buts”.
The “buts” come from us, not the Big G.
I really could go on and on, but alas, I have my own kids to go tend to this morning.
Thanks for the post and allowing the diverse comments.
You are very brave and I am glad you are so open.
Peace.
Wow, there is so much I could say. I should start by saying that I am a Christian, I believe that Christ died for my sins and that the Bible is the inspired word of God. The next thing I want to say is that I agree with you Anita. Had I gone to a service like that I probably would not return to that church. There is nothing that bothers me more than when the “churched” take a holier than thou attitude towards the world. When you read and study the Bible, its very clear that Jesus came to save the world, which includes ALL of us. And He spent His time with the prostitutes and tax collecters – not judging them, but loving them! There are some who believe and some who don’t, but the Lord loves ALL of us equally. And He wants us all to believe in Him and be saved so that He can be with us forever. Because we are His children. Just like we all love our children and want the best for them. But I firmly believe He doesn’t want us going around talking about how because we believe we are better than everyone else! There are those who might be considered “lost” – ie nonbelievers – but it doesn’t mean they are “bad”! I hope you will give another church and the Lord a chance. The Lord is a really “good guy” when you get to really know Him.
Also I want to say thanks to you and your husband for your sacrifices – I am SO THANKFUL for everyone in the armed forces and police/firemen too. Without them we would not have the wonderful life we have here in the US and I really appreciate it! Thank you!
I’m not sure everyone who commented actually read your post! Enjoyed visiting. Thanks for all the sacrifices your family makes for our country.
Thank you for stopping by and have been by your blog
A wonderful article…. In my life, I have never seen a man be so selfless in helping others around him to get along and get working. I feel good that there are people like you too. Thanks for this great weblog of yours. Its surely going to get me to go to higher places!